The Revolution of Feminist Sex Tech

Let’s be honest, buying sex toys can be awkward. There’s usually one clerk watching you under fluorescent lighting while you’re surrounded by uncomfortable looking lingerie and products marketed mostly towards men. Pairing that atmosphere with absolute silence save for the porn being played in the “back room” and grey carpeting makes the average sex shopping experience anything but erotic. Thankfully, we’re not the only ones who noticed this issue. Over the past few years many sex-positive women have stepped up to the plate and decided to make shopping for all things erotica a much more enjoyable experience. To give you some insight into the new, world of erotic shopping (and maybe fuel your online spending habit),  we reached out to two ladies working in the sex tech industry at two different levels.

Nina Haines is both a marketing intern of quarterly sex toy box, Unbound as well as the community manager of sex positive group, Women of Sex Tech. She considers herself a connecting bridge between the over one-hundred sex-positive women, femme-identifying and non-binary individuals that are a part of the community. According to their website, Unbound was created because the founders, “felt the world lacked a place to have fun, inclusive conversations around sex so [they] set out to create that world.” Unbound has gone from being a labor of love (translation: they started it in our tiny NYC apartments) to a leader in changing how feminists explore and enjoy their sex lives. “Through the quarterly box, online shop and Unbound Magazine, we believe in the radical possibilities of pleasure and that we are better when we, ahem, come together,” she says.

Taylor Sparks is an Erotic Educator and the founder of Organic Loven. With over a decade of experience in the natural skin care and cosmetics industry, Sparks launched OrganicLoven.com, a site that offers organic, natural and eco-friendly sensual body pleasures. According to their website, “at Organic Loven, you’ll learn to immerse yourself in the sexual creature you deserve to be while honoring the health of your body.”

Now let’s get down to business, which these gals are happy to mix with pleasure.

Rogue Habits: Before working at your current company, what was your relationship to sex shops? How did they make you feel walking into them, what was your attitude on buying products, etc?

Nina Haines: Before working at Unbound, I had never owned a vibrator before! In fact, I even once used one of those electric toothbrushes to masturbate with in high school – I kept it under my mattress (sorry, mom). Gross, I know, but I was desperate. I went into my first sex toy shop in midtown Manhattan with my old roommate so she could buy a vibrator. I felt so gross – we were the only women there, the only young people there. When I met my boss and she-ro, Polly Rodriguez (co-founder of Unbound and the Women of Sex Tech), she gave me my first Unbound Box and my first vibrator. Now, I own over 30 different toys (perks of the job)! They’re like my children (and I definitely have favorites).

 

RH: How has working for your current company changed your attitude about these things, or maybe enforced previously held beliefs/feelings towards erotica stores?

 

Taylor Sparks: As my business is online, I will speak to other online erotic stores. The one thing that I changed was that I wanted Organic Loven to be welcoming to everyone. I didn’t want the first thing that you see when you visit our store [to be] a big ole dildo. I wanted something that spoke to both men and women. A site that had a flair of sophistication. This is not to take away from what other brands feel is their way of marketing to their clientele. I wanted our clients to feel as though they could shop on our site no matter where they were in the world.

NH: Working for Unbound has definitely made me appreciate the existence of safe spaces for non-cis men that facilitate discussions of masturbation and vibrators. The history of the sex toy and the present sex toy history is so male-dominated. Companies like Unbound have to exist so that female and non-binary pleasure can be given a seat at the table – so that products can be created outside of the gender binary, focusing on safety, pleasure, and accessibility rather than pure profit.

RH: What does your company do differently than other sex stores?

TS: We [Organic Loven] are the only site that focuses on all organic and eco-friendly intimate body products, body safe sex toys, sexual education via our books and our erotic seminars, and adults only vacations. It is this combination that makes us unique! As a certified holistic aromatherapist all products are curated by me, Taylor Sparks. We present and exhibit at sex positive events, open lifestyle cruises, hotels, hotel take over events and conventions around the world. We focus on educating those who are actively seeking sexuality based education, whether it is about the newest toy or to show them a product that assists with erectile disfunction or our many books on relationships.

NH: Overall, Unbound creates gender neutral, aesthetically pleasing and discreet pleasure products that women and non-binary folk actually love and want to use. Because the history of the sex toy is so male-dominated, those men have created toys in the likeness of what they think women want, which is themselves… literally. Further, Unbound is direct to consumer, allowing us to offer the best prices possible – sexuality and masturbation with vibrators should not be something that is a “luxury” and is exclusive to those who can afford it.

RH: How do you feel like your company’s products/services encourage body love?

TS: Because we care about the ingredients that are in our products and we strive to educate our clients on loving the bodies they love to love! We care that the brands we represent through our company care about the planet, animals and both their local and world wide communities.

NH: Masturbation is all about body love! Also, the Unbound Magazine offers hundreds of amazing resources and articles discussing self-love, masturbation, sex education, and more.

 

RH: What do you feel like sex tech’s relationship to empowerment is?

TS: I don’t really believe that sex toys “empower” a person. I believe that a person first becomes empowered through their own inward focus and then uses sex toys (technology) to satisfy whatever it is that they wish. Empowerment, motivation, happiness… they are all “inside” jobs, not outside.

NH: Sex tech, especially female and non-binary founded sex tech, encourages conversation about sex and sexuality. For female and non-binary bodies, society and history have discouraged this type of discourse, increasing body shame and insecurity about one’s sexuality. Sex tech allows women and non-binary folk to explore their bodies in new ways and experience pleasure solely for themselves, which can be a very empowering thing.

Feature photo courtesy of Unbound.