How Self Love Became the Foundation for My Career as a Freelancer

It seems that self-care much of the time does not go hand in hand with our careers. Rather than being integrated, it lingers within the realm of personal time and something we do when we’re completely burnt out at the end of the week. Perhaps that’s why so many people are pursuing remote work and their passions in search of a job that expands your boundaries for self care rather than how many hours you can work without taking a break. What if self love became the foundation of your career? That’s exactly what freelancing turned out to be for me.

The tumultuous, but rewarding journey of working as a freelance writer put me face to face with myself in a way that radically changed my internal relationship. It challenged me to invest not just in my career, but in my relationship with myself. Whether you’re freelancing now, considering taking the leap, or committed to your office job, you can always grow, especially when it comes to self love.

Procrastination vs. Self Care

Most freelancers will tell you that procrastination is their ultimate kryptonite. When you’re working on your own time, it’s easy to get distracted and waste the day away. Other times, you may genuinely need a break. To tell the difference between procrastinating and taking care of yourself, ask, “Will this help me accomplish my task or is it just a distraction?” When you’re working behind a computer all day, you probably really need that hour long yoga break to clear your mind, release body aches, and stimulate creativity. On the other hand, gossiping with your roommate for an hour is probably not going to contribute to your productivity in the long run. (Although, interestingly enough, studies do show that watching cute cat videos does stimulate productivity).

Another helpful clue is that self care is usually born out of tenderness for yourself, while procrastination often comes from a place of insecurity. If you dig deep to find out what’s really holding you back from starting a project, the root feeling might be thoughts of inferiority and unworthiness aka impostor syndrome (here’s how to combat that). Studies have shown that women, especially high achievers, could be at a higher risk for impostor syndrome. Journaling, meditating, or practicing yoga can help you figure out the real cause of your procrastination issue.

Make Yourself the Priority

When you’re freelancing, no one is going to be around to pick up your slack if you get sick or need a mental health day. Not only are you your own boss, you’re also your only employee and the resource driving your business. If you don’t take care of yourself and listen to your body, you’ll end up burning out.

What happens when you burn out? More typos, missed deadlines, and fatigued creative muscles; hardly the recipe for a successful career. As a freelancer, investing in yourself is literally the same thing as making investments into your career. You are your own most valuable resource. Treat yourself accordingly.

 

Set Boundaries

One of the most growth inspiring aspects about working as a freelancer is that you can say no to things you don’t want to do. That can be hard for many of us, especially the people pleasers. When I first started out, I received an offer to write a series of blog posts, but the editor made some inappropriate comments that made me uncomfortable. I resisted the urge to say, “Yes” to everything and rejected the offer. Whether a client offers too little pay or doesn’t treat you with respect, learning to turn down a project will protect yourself and your time.

If you don’t set firm boundaries you may end up subjecting yourself to a freelancing horror called Scope Creep, which is basically when an assignment keeps growing, but the pay stays the same. When a client starts asking for you to do additional work outside of the original agreement, express your excitement to collaborate further, but kindly request that they compensate accordingly. If you don’t treat yourself like a valuable resource, no one will. 

Wrangle Self Doubt

Clients won’t magically show up at your doorstep, so you have to learn to market yourself with confidence. It can be uncomfortable to show off your achievements. This seems to be especially true for women. Some studies have demonstrated that women are often less likely to self promote than men. That’s why freelancing is such a powerful way to practice identifying your strengths and giving yourself the praise you deserve for work well done.

Freelancing is a career that demands constant growth. To get where you want in your career you must constantly challenge yourself to pitch to bigger clients and ask for the pay you deserve. Pitching to intimidating clients and determining how much your time is worth are invaluable ways to overcoming the fear of failure and rejection that plagues virtually everyone.

Trust Yourself

When you break promises like, “I’ll work for 3 more hours after lunch,” you stop trusting yourself. Research indicates that self trust is a necessary precondition of self-esteem and self respect. Other studies have suggested that self trust may be closely related to creativity.

Whether you’re freelancing or working in an office, you’ll learn pretty quickly that it’s impossible to run a business when there’s no trust. Freelancing forces you to develop the practice of keeping the promises you make to yourself, which will eventually expand into other aspects of your life.

Featured image courtesy of  Kinga Cichewicz.